Thursday, April 27, 2006

More Info Than You Ever Wanted to Know

I got this from Ron and spent a large chunk of my life filling it out:

MEME: 157 QUESTIONS (was supposed to be 200, but the people at Myspace apparently can't count)

1. My middle name is: Gregory
2. I was born on: March 27, 1968 when dinosaurs roamed the earth
3. I am: filling out a meme
4. My cell phone company is: cell phone-less
5. My eye color is: hazel/brown
6. My shoe size is: 14/15 (16 with skis)
7. My ring size is: back in high school when my mom insisted on getting me a class ring, I think it was 9. I think I wore it two times to make her happy but have never worn a ring since (except for skull, bat, or spider rings around Halloween)
8. My height is: it used to be six three, but as the disks in my back crumble, I’m getting progressively shorter
9. I am allergic to: cats and ash tree pollen
10. My bedtime: whenever all my work is done and Devilboy is asleep (2:30 last night)

11. One thing I know for sure about the opposite sex is: they spend lots of money
12. I am glad I'm me because: that matches the name on my drivers license
13. It sucks that I'm me because: I have no sleep or money
14. If I could be anyone else for one day: a narcoleptic millionaire
15. My celebrity dream date is: the basis of a future episode of Divorce Court
16. My favorite day of the week is: Monday (my one day off)
17. My favorite color is: tangerine/puce
18. My favorite fairy tale is: The Children who Played Butcher
19. My favorite holiday is: Leif Erikson Day (no real favorite)
20. The perfect kiss is: the sole property and trademark of the Hershey’s Chocolate Company

21. The last CD's I bought: Dire Straits Brothers in Arms (Death, where is thy sting?)
22. Last song that made me cry was: “I Will Wait for You” (or whatever the name of the song on the Jurassic Bark episode of Futurama)
23. My most treasured possession(s) are: my stories and I’m obligated to say my kids
24. What did you do last night: got home from work, cleaned up the mess, read Midsummer Night’s Dream (for class), and took the dog out.
25. My skin's reaction to the sun is (tan/burn): burn then tan
26. Last time you were at the beach: June 2000.
27. What kind of car do you drive: A Jeep Grand Cherokee SUV

28. Do you believe in Santa: If my kids are listening
29. Do you believe in love at first sight: If you mean physical attraction that blossoms into something more
30. Do you believe in luck: If you mean being on the plus side of a statistical event
31. Do you believe in fate: no
32. Do you believe in aliens: I believe in the possibility of aliens (which is pretty much how I believe in anything)
33. Do you believe in heaven: see above
34. Do you believe in hell: Did I mention I was married?
35. Do you believe in ghosts: Not in the traditional sense but I’m open to the possibility of some sort of psychic energy or force not yet detectable
36. Do you believe in horoscopes: at last, an unequivocal no
37. Do you believe in soulmates: you’d have to define soulmate
38. Do you believe in dinosaurs: How can you include dinosaurs in this crop of questions? It’s theoretically possible that dinosaurs are all an elaborate hoax but you could say that about WWII.
39. Do you believe in miracles: It depends what you mean by miracle
40. Do you believe in the death penalty: I’m pretty sure it exists (do I believe it’s morally acceptable? in limited circumstances

41. Hugs or kisses: I’m going to fall back to the chocolate joke and say both
42. Drunk or High: drunk in the past tense
43. Phone or Online: online
44. Red Hair or Black Hair: for me, black; for wife, red
45. Mohawk or Mullet: uh, male pattern baldness
46. Hot or Cold: cold
47. Summer or Winter: winter
48. Coffee or Tea: me
49. Chocolate or Vanilla: vanilla
50. Night or Day: night

51. Oranges or Apples: I don’t look this way from eating healthy
52. Curly or Straight Hair: straight for me; curly for wife53. Gloves or Mittens: gloves
54. Abortion: If I ran the circus, I’d spend as much on birth control R&D as the current crew spend on Iraq. If I could put it in the drinking water like Brave New World, I would. My goal would be no abortions or unplanned pregnacies in general. But I wouldn’t make abortion illegal or restricted.
55. Backstabbers: uh, are bad (is anyone pro-backstabbery?)
56. Parents: I guess I’m pro-parents
57. Children: very noisy, destructive, and expensive
58. Animals: the sensible alternative to children. They’re also good to eat
59. Leashes for kids: I have one for Devilboy but have never used it yet
60. School: I wish I were back

61. Life: if it’s so great, how do you explain the stunning success of the virus?
62. Bangs: I’m honestly not sure what exactly bangs are in hair style.
63. The name Bernard: good for a large breed of dogs
64. Beer Pong: at UC, I got to the semi-finals in intermural Ping Pong and consistently placed well in Chug Offs but I never saw the need to combine the two
65. Alcohol: God, I miss it
66. PDAs: I’m too old to know what this means
67. Last time I kissed someone: Earlier today
68. Last time I hugged someone: Earlier today
69. Seen someone I haven't seen in awhile: No one comes to mind. I did just see an old picture of my wife’s dead cat today.
70. Missed someone: I’m going to have to make an obligatory snow ball fight joke

71. Grew: ear, nose, and facial hair
72. Drew a smiley face: I can’t remember
73. Ate something: about half an hour ago when Devilboy and I had chicken tenders
74. Took a Shower: this morning
75. Tripped Over Something: last night at the deli
76. Saw a play or movie: (#82 makes me think that this includes anything on DVD) within the last couple days
76. Read a book: last night
77. Traveled: in 2001 when I went to Context in Columbus
78. Filled out a survey: since this is defined as a survey in question 178, now
79. Who's the ditziest person I know: probably my stepdaughter
80. Who makes you laugh the most: all in all, Devilboy

81. One thing I'm mad about now is: Devilboy is spitting popsicle juice after I steam cleaned the carpet today
82. The last movie I saw in the theater was: Fellowship of the Ring, five years ago or so
83. The thing I don't understand is: there are many, many things
84. The most unsatisfactory answer I've ever recieved (sic) was: on a poetry test
85. The one thing I love about the opposite sex is: it’s been too long to remember
86. This summer: I will probably work nights at the deli
87. Something I really miss when I leave home: this question was not written with me in mind
88. The thing I'm looking forward to the most: sleep
89. Tomorrow: I’ll show Midsummer Night’s Dream in class
90. Today: I didn’t have to work but watched Devilboy
91. Next Summer: I have no idea
92. Next Week: NKU will be over
93. This Weekend: I’ll pick up final papers at NKU
94. Next Weekend: I’ll finish grading

95. People Call me: on the phone
96. The Last Thing I Bought: Chicken tenders, a case of diet Pepsi, a box of Cascade, a half-price off bag of Easter candy, an Eye-Spy book (for Devilboy), and a toy car (for Devilboy)
97. My favorite place to shop is: I don’t like shopping
98. In my wallet I carry: so many cards and crap that I’m not going to bother listing them all
99. The person who knows about the most about me: I’m an enigma
100. The person that can read me the best is: no one stands out
101. The most difficult thing to do is: that which is physically impossible
102. I have gotten a speeding ticket: when I was 19
103. I have the following siblings: Jane and Chrissy
104. Something about my siblings: Jane lives in Tennessee; Chrissy is expecting a baby

105. My Zodiac Sign: the ram
106. Brand of Computer: Hewlett Packard
107. The one person who can't hide things from me: I draw a complete blank...the Penguin?
108. Cook or Eat Out: eat out
109. Right now I am talking to: Devilboy
110. I wish I were talking to: the guy who hands out lottery winnings
111. Favorite Vacation Spot: same as question 85
112. I have a job at: UC Clermont, NKU, and the Kroger deli
113. I have these pets: a dog, seven hamsters, and a fish
114. I hope: I make enough to quit the deli
115. The worst sound in the world: would be inaudible in space
116. The person that makes me cry the most is: Devilboy
117. The last time you cried: when watching the “Jurassic Bark”
118. Why did you cry: because I was half-mad with sleep deprivation

119. Favorite Food: chocolate covered cashews
120. Favorite Breakfast Food: chocolate covered cashews
121. Favorite Lunch Food: chocolate covered cashews
122. Favorite Dinner Food: chocolate covered cashews
123. Favorite Dessert: chocolate covered cashews
124. Favorite Drink: real Cherry Coke
125. Florida or Hawaii: Florida
126. North or South Pole: South
127. My favorite piece of clothing: anything that’s clean
128. My favorite sport to play is: Minesweeper
129. My favorite sport to watch is: pole-dancing
130. My favorite sports figure: that guy from the April’s fools issue of Sports Illustrated who was supposed to be able to throw a 130-mph fastball

131. The school I went to: Walnut Hills then UC
132. Last person I got mad at was: Devilboy (see #81)
133. Worst Drinking Experience: getting tossed out of a bar/arrested/taking my shorts off, throwing up in them, and carrying it home (although now it seems strangely appealing)
134. All Time Best Song: “Timothy” by the Buoys (“Joe said that he would sell his soul for just. . . a piece . . . of meat.”)
135. All Time Best Band: I can’t decide and I’m losing interest in this
136. All Time Best Painting: Salador Dali’s Corpus Hypercubus
137. All Time Best Movie: Satyricon (you have to wait for the ending)
138. All Time Best Thing In The World: zinc
139. What tattoo would you like and where: I like tattoos on other people

140. Most annoying person I know is: too many to pick
141. I lose all respect for people: all the time
142. The movies I have cried at: usually involve dogs (My Dog Skip for instances)
143. I have a scar: my most prominent scars are from my dog biting me on the shoulder and when he yanked his leash and caused me to jam my fingers in the opening mechanism of a gate (they would have to ask those questions back to back)
144. The last time I skinned my knees was: I was cleaning the carpets and tried to scrub out a stain. The chemicals ate through the skin of my kneecaps and disolved the leg hair in a larger circle around the wounds.
145. My hidden talent: is well hidden
146. I have a craving for: sleep
147. The worst pain I was ever in was: physically, probably having my wisdom teeth out
148. My favorite quote: “Remember that the most beautiful things in the world are the most useless, peacocks and lilies for instance.” John Ruskins (not really my favorite but the best I could come up with.
149. My room is: nonexistent--I’m married.

150. I love: all that is good
151. I hate: the Care Bears
152. My life: is more than statistically half over
153. My weakness: multi-tasking
154. What I look for in a mate: I might not be the best person to ask
155. Who broke your heart: My dog Snoozer when he died
156. I filled out this survey: on a computer
157. Name the one person you trust the most: Devilboy. . .I trust him to destroy in mindless rampages.

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