Thursday, March 04, 2004

They're Coming to Take Me Away

I had two hallucinations today and yesterday. I'm hoping it's due to the diseases I picked up from cleaning up my kids' puke and other bodily fluids but I might wind up writing posts with a Crayon.

I didn't even recognize the first hallucination as anything unusual when it happened. I was getting the kids ready in the morning and saw one of my daughter's hair bands on the side of a toy tin. I didn't think anything of it until I went to do her hair and couldn't find the band again. It was on the kitchen counter and when I examined the tin, its side was totally smooth. There was nothing for a hair band to get caught on.

I think I saw the hair band while I was making breakfast and while I was walking to the bedroom and looked towards the tin, my mind cut and pasted the image upon it. (Like a computer monitor when you're scrolling down a page and an image remains on screen when it shouldn't be.) Now I wonder what is really around me and what's just a displaced memory. Everything else that I've tested has been real but don't plan to do much driving this weekend.

From what I understand, if you see a coin on the floor, pick it up and see it as a silver dollar, it's a hallucination if nothing was ever there. It's a delusion if it was really a dime or something else tangible, just not what you saw. I don't know what to call my experience.

Tonight during dinner, for a moment it was if the green from the table cloth shifted up to the ceiling as if I were looking through green cellophane.

I remember reading Cary Grant describe a time he took LSD, saying that "the green came out of the grass." I'm not sure if it was that or if it was just a ghost impression on my retinas (like when you stare at a black pattern then look away and have a negative ghostly image in your vision).

It just occurred to me that both happened when I was feeding my kids. Maybe I should just order out for a while.

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