Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Really Bad MO

I only make light of this situation because it is so preposterous. Anyone with children can tell you that any brat capable of being trained like this would slit your throat at the soonest available minute and be off with your car and liquor cabinet.

This is how I would envision things if I tried to use Devilboy in such a scheme:

Evil Version of Me: Okay, go up to that woman and give her this piece of paper.
Devilboy (stares blankly and scratches himself)
EVM: Listen! Take this paper and give it to someone you want to see hurt.
DB (Takes paper and gives it back to me)
EVM (Shoves paper in his hand): No! Give-this-paper-to-that-woman!
DB (Looks at paper and eats it)
EVM: Stop! You're ruining my dreams of successful serial murder! Take, uh, just memorize this address.
DB (sees raccoon; chases and kills it)
Innocent Victim: Excuse me but is that your child dancing in a spray of raccoon guts?
EVM: Why, no. But would you mind pressing this doorbell?
IV: Which doorbell?
EVM: This one (ZAAAPPP) AAAARRRGGGHH!!!

Okay, so it's not Tennessee Williams but it should show you that this isn't something to worry about.

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